Reading and Writing Assignment for 11/13

    Michael' s mother take the hundred penny box away——with aunt Dew' s memories, though Michael is very against. After Michael' s mother takes it away, aunt Dew is lunacy. She drops everything in her hand and can not recognize anybody——even Michael and his father. Three days later, aunt Dew sleeps on her little bed and never gets up. Everybody thinks she is dead, and put her in a coffin. Before people close the coffin, Michael leaps out at the coffin and cry loudly. When Michael' s mother see this scene, she was moved. She runs toward the garbage can and find the dirty hundred penny box fast. Nobody see there are two tears slide down on her face when she put the hundred penny box into aunt Dew' s hand. Suddenly, aunt Dew is wake up. Everybody can not believe this scene, aunt Dew did not eat and drink any thing in these days! But she still alive! Maybe this is the" love' s power". After that day, aunt Dew and Michael' s mother are good friend, they live together happily.

Wow!!! This is absolutely terrific. It's incredibly imaginative (showing creativity, having special talents of mind). I totally love the idea of "love's power" making Aunt Dew come alive again. I thought you might do something very interesting. But even I didn't think it would be this good.

I will send you a couple of grammar comments via e-mail. But this is definitely even better than I expected, and I was already expecting it to be very good.

Well done.  Laraine

Aunt Dew said to Michael:”Litter John, maybe here is not for me……”Michael don’t know what Aunt Dew mean is, But the next day ,when Michael get up ,he see his mom and Dad is looking for Aunt Dew! Aunt Dew is gone; The Hundred Penny Box is gone with Aunt Dew too! Michael’s parents are worry about Aunt Dew, they put advertisement on the newspaper, they put announcement everywhere, but they don’t find Aunt Dew. A few days ago, Aunt Dew come back with herself, she don’t say anything about these time, nobody know where she go, nobody know what she do, she just say:”I just had a litter trip.” and nobody know why she go, why she come back, maybe she see the advertisement about her, and she know they love her, so she back, Maybe. At last they are happy together, Michael had a Hundred Penny box too, but there are not many penny in there, because he was just a litter boy.

What a nice job Cindy! I like the way you made Aunt Dew's longing to see Michael's father the reason (motivation) for why she leaves. I really like too that you used in your new ending what we learned in the previous class about ads.  And I just love your ending about Michael's penny box. This is great. As always your writing reflects (shows or reveals) your great imagination. Lovely work.

I am going to send you a couple of comments about grammar and use of prepositions via e-mail.  See you in class. Laraine

Hello,Laraine

       Mother  want to take Aunt Dew's hundred penny box,Michal said to his mother:"Mum! You can't take Aunt Dew's hunder penny box! That's her whole life!If you take it maybe she will dead!""I don't care about her, But I can't let an old,big ,dirth box in the house !"Mother said just like she is angry.Michal cried, he run to his room,Aunt Dew is sitting there singing,"OH!what !"Aunt Dew see Michal,"What you do!""Mother want to take you hundred penny box!!!" Michal plump out,Then, Aunt Dew freeze,She thinks:She,she want to take,take my hundred peny box?" Oh no,She just want to change a new, pretty box of that hundred penny box."Michal explained,"she don't want to,like take your life she just think you may want a new box."Then Michal run to his father and mother's room,take out the mahogany box, and take it to Aunt Dew,"OH ,That's so pretty!Aunt Dew very like this box,"OK,I think I like this box more than that one,"she said.She start put the penny(that in the old box)into the new box when she done Michal tah\ke the old one to Mun:"I think Aunt Dew like your mahogany box.""Hey You take my box?Mother said "Just joke,that's good."

      After this day, Aunt Dew and mother starts talking, and become friends.

Hi Enya,

That is a very interesting ending and different from anyone else's.  Nice work!

I like, too, how you used dialogue to move the story along. Your ending was very clever too. Nice use of the verb "freeze" to express Aunt Drew's shock at the old box being taken from her. Using verbs that make the reader see what's happening is the mark of a fine writer.

I will send you a few additional comments via e-mail. Very well done.  Laraine