Reading and Writing Assignment 9th class 9/10/15

     The Wonka factory has done it again! The Never Melting Chocolate Bar just came out on the market. general chocolate is always melt under the big sun or in people's hands. But this kind of Chocolate would never melt in anywhere! You can keep this chocolate in your hand and under the big sun, after even one hour it still won't be melt! I belive this kind of chocolate will be very very popular!

Here is the new results of Wonka factory!!! The growing up fruits jelly drops tree just came out on the market. You can plant the tree anywhere, garden, flowerpot. You only need to put some water in it [don’t put too much, it will died.], it will grow up to a tree and you will see lot of jelly drops on it! Apple jelly drop, banana jelly drop, peach jelly drop, even chocolate jelly drop and seafood jelly drop. Is that amazing right? Go buy one! [still don’t put too much water.]

@ Mark

 

I also think the Never Melting Chocolate Bar is a winner, and I like how specific you are in describing it i.e. It won't melt in the sun or in your hand.  Nice closing sentence too. Good Work!

@Cindy

 

This is different from what you said in class, and it's even better! I really like how concrete the language is. You don't just say, you could plant it anywhere. Instead, you tell the reader that it could even be planted in a flower pot. That's the kind of visual image that pulls the reader in.

 

And you don't just say that the tree will have a lot of jelly drops. Instead, you are very specific. There will be banana, peach, and "even chocolate jelly drops."

 

You did a great job on this assignment. L.

Hello，Laraine

     The Wonka factory has done it again! The Ever Growing Chocolate just came out on the market!For almost every one, chocolate is delicious. But when you finish a great chocolate bar do you feel you want more chocolate? If you have the Ever Growing Chocolate Bar, you will never feel you need more chocolate but you don't have it again! Because when you bite it ,it can grow to a whole bar again!!! Quick! You need it! Come and buy it!

Nice work. I especially like that you are writing complex sentences and punctuating them correctly.